Fenny's Bla Bla Blog

Christmas cards trickle in

one, a few, a batch of ten

from family and accumulated friends

Some close, some you never see

but most of them hovering somewhere in between

All sizes too, big and small

some self-made, but most self-bought

with snowy landscapes and Santa Claus

or lots of glitter on colourful Christmas balls

But they all bring the same holiday cheer

and make you feel more blessed

with every Christmas wish you get

Here's my card for you

©2009 Fenny

What to do

with all the useless memories made

all those moments

from so many years

locked firmly in your mind

that suddenly have lost

their meaning and their shine

You can’t throw them out

like you did

with the mementos

and the keepsakes

or hit delete

and whoosh

they’re gone

like little typographical mistakes

Useless and annoying they pop up

between the good and the fine

casting their cold shadows

and there’s nothing you can do

but regret

and hope that in time

you’ll simply forget

©2009 Fenny

Come lie with me for a while

let's give our souls the time they need

to align

Just you and me

and the way we truly feel

until no walls exist

and only love remains

Then hold me in your arms

while I rest my head upon your heart

and listen to its reassuring whispers

dreaming that we’ll never part

©2009 Fenny

Dutch Version:

Monday, December 07, 2009

Laat Ons Samen Liggen

Laat ons samen liggen

zodat onze zielen

ruimschoots de tijd hebben

om zich te verbinden

Alleen jij en ik

en wat we voelen diep van binnen

tot we elke muur hebben geslecht

en alleen de liefde is overgebleven

Houd me daarna in je armen

terwijl ik mijn hoofd te rusten leg op je hart

en luister naar zijn geruststellend gefluister

dromend dat onze wegen

nooit zullen scheiden

©2009 Fenny

I follow the coffee aroma to its source

looking for some mild wake up time

My baby's made breakfast

'French style'

and life

on this drowsy Sunday morning

seems so worthwhile

That is

until baby speaks

and lets the bomb

he's been sitting on

for months apparently

detonate in my face

©2009 Fenny

My skin’s all wrinkled

colour’s a ghostly grey

from rain

and lack of sun

I struggle hard

to get away

but they cling to me

like we belong

Like angry black sheep

they hover my sky

threatening

dark and vile

leaving no room

for birds to fly

or a single ray

to make life worthwhile

©2009 Fenny

Long ago when I was still a child

you lost the battle for your life

after a fierce fight

fought with all your might

And for years now I’ve wondered

what did you see

that made you cling to life’s tree

like the last leaf of autumn

Was there no light

and none to guide you

to the other side

No angels

no glimmer of eternal peace

and did you not feel relieve

With your life having become unbearable

towards the end

what fears could death have sent

And were it his demons showing you

what would be next

or were it your own that scared you away

from taking the final step

At the very end

much as that last leaf of autumn

a light breeze was enough

to take you from this world

Totally worn

you lost your grasp

and a brittle leaf was sent airborne

I hope it found peace at last

©2009 Fenny

Like pebbles rippling the water

we ripple each others lives

until the water calms

and the surface

all smooth again

has no visible proof left

But the pebbles nevertheless

will lie forever

on the bottom of our hearts

stirred only

by the currents of memory

every once in a while

©2009 Fenny

There’s an old swing

hanging from one of the trees

out back

that craves child’s play

They used to come and sway

every day

he says

and wonders why

they’ve stopped coming by

And not even the wind

though in a playful mood today

can make him forget

©2009 Fenny

All your pain silently wept

in one grief packed droplet

falling from the corner of your eye

unnoticed by anyone

but me

Traceless

it ran down your perfect cheek

while you quickly regained yourself

even smiled

before you began to speak

But the sorrow in that lonely tear

said so much more

©2009 Fenny

She dreamt she was a flower

blooming in a field

petals wide open

her gentle heart revealed

Waving softly in the breeze

while taking in some sun

she was never happier

and then the dream was gone

©2009 Fenny

You went wherever I went

for more than fourteen years

the only one I ever told all

about my hopes and fears

Never judgemental

not capable of holding a grudge

and always melting my heart

with your eyes of rich chocolate fudge

I love you deeply

and you surely were my truest of friends

and so it’s doubly sad our life together

has reached its inevitable end

On your favourite spot in the garden

you laid your weary head to rest

and peacefully went to heaven

in that you were truly blessed

No pain

no suffering

your heart just stopped

ceased remembering

how to beat

Now from the empty morning

in which I miss your enthusiastic greet

to the lonely night

without you lying snoring at my feet

I miss you throughout the day

But there’s kind solace that softens your depart

the countless memories of you frolicking about

will always warm my heart

Goodbye my friend

©2009 Fenny

I don’t want to be a spring anemone

opening my petals to the wind

who in return will blow them away

without as much as a hint

nor do I want to be a basking rose

that withers in the sun

and is all dried up dead

before summer’s been and gone

is what a simple weed said

when offered a choice

by mother Flora

and she went on

And most certainly not an apple tree

losing all its sweet

when autumn leaves softly rustle

underneath peoples feet

nor a bright winter jasmine

blooming alone in a shower of stars

like a little lost soldier

in between winter day wars

No just let me be a simple weed

and I’ll always find a way

to show my leaves

and never shy

©2009 Fenny

Just before dawn

when it’s not dark anymore

but not light either

when everything is shadowless and grey

and only exists through soft whispers

and innuendo

and the air feels like pure silk

softly stroking his body

while the stillness of his motions

almost makes him seem sheer endless

but life itself lacks all meaning

other than to exist

that’s when he wings the sky

looking for prey

©2009 Fenny

Never has there been

a greater injustice

or sin - if you would -

than man robbing earth

of all her beauty and good

leaving nothing but dearth

©2009 Fenny

Our town has disappeared

beneath last night’s ton of snow

and trees moan loud while bending double

under their heavy load

The warning’s out

everyone should best stay indoors

for expectations are

there will come down a whole lot more

The word disaster’s spread

all over the news

but when I look outside

all I see is beauty and peace

Suddenly our busy lives

have come full stop

and not used to taking it as it comes

that much

reactions are a bit over the top

So ease your minds

and lose your frowns

and enjoy this wintry spell

the heavens sent down

for in a week or two

at the most

the snow will all have melted

and disappeared

like an evanescent ghost

©2009 Fenny

Between the layers of my skin

I store all that hurts

and don’t want deep within

even if they’re only words

©2009 Fenny

Pour me another cup of stupid

and sweeten it

with lumps of ignorance

for I feel better

not knowing

©2009 Fenny